Part of our Sunday School lesson this morning was about regarding others as more important than ourselves. How timely, because I was pondering that dilemma as it applies to care giving. As many of you know, my husband and I are caring for his 90 year old mother, who lives with us. We also live with our son and his fiance and our three young grandchildren, aged 7, 3, and 8 months. The children need even more care than my mother in law. Especially the eight month old baby.

It is how we treat the most vulnerable among us when no one is looking: the babies, the mentally handicapped, and the elderly with dementia, that defines our faith and our capacity to love. I am sometimes shocked to discover how people behave when they think no one is looking. Cultures that develop in organizations where abuse and neglect is tolerated is also shocking.

The golden rule (do unto others as you would have them do unto you) is good but pales in comparison to treating others as BETTER than ourselves.  So what happens if we don’t consider others more important than ourselves? Others suffer, that is what happens.

For most people, to do the right thing, to consider others more important than ourselves, requires a faith in God and a fear of God, I believe. God is watching you and will punish you if you do not treat others well, even when no one is looking, in other words.

Some people have the kind of love for their fellow man (and woman) that God has (agape love) without the fear of punishment– but it is rare, in my opinion. We sometimes think all mothers have this kind of love, but not all mothers do. Do you know someone who has agape love? I do. She and I used to work together with the residents who had dementia at Liberty Ridge. Agape love in action is a beautiful thing to behold.

So here at the health club for seniors we have always emphasized the golden rule, but now I am thinking, we should emphasize treating others as better than ourselves instead.