This past week has been focused on finding day care for our almost two year old grandson. We found a day care that has an after school and non-school day program for Jack (not his real name for protection), the almost six years old, but they do not have a space currently to accommodate our almost two year old grandson, Nolan (not his real name). We have been on their waiting list since July. I visited there Monday just to remind them that we are anxiously awaiting placement. The director told me that they will not have anything open up until November, at the earliest. I can’t wait until November.

Nolan is a very bright and inquisitive baby. He cannot be left alone for a second or something bad will happen. So far all he has found time to do is over-flow a bathroom sink and reach into a potted plant for a handful of dirt.He makes it difficult to have a complete thought, and impossible to complete a task uninterrupted. His nap time is way too short, and he seems to need as much sleep at night as I do. Our son has been working long hours this week, but he did give me a morning to go to the doctor for an eye infection check-up and a lunch and learn. The rest of the week I have had Nolan from early in the morning until after 7:30 in the evening. We are working on establishing a routine so Nolan and Jack will go to bed early enough (7:30 ) to get the recommended amount of sleep for their ages, but that requires a process. I have been waking Nolan up at the same time I get Jack up for school (6:30) and encouraging napping for just an hour after lunch. They have been going to bed earlier and earlier all week so we are almost there. Of course the process has been fraught with much crankiness and tears.

Searching for child day care for Nolan in our area seems much like searching for adult day care. We want something close to where we live or work so that we are not spending an unreasonable amount of time dropping off and picking up. Our schedules are jam packed enough without wasting time traveling. The options near us are limited for child care—non existent for adult care.

We want Nolan to be in a trusted environment because he cannot yet speak for himself. In my experience, child care centers are best because there is accountability and oversight. Church affiliated centers are less likely to be profit-motivated and therefore the ratios are more child friendly. I used to work at a non-faith affiliated center and the sight of twenty children aged two year olds in one big room haunts me still. When we had the responsibility of caring for Lawrence’s mother, the same was true when we needed a place for her to spend the day because she had dementia and could not be depended upon to account for her experiences.

And just as we could not find full time care when we needed it for my husband’s mother, we cannot find full time care immediately for Nolan. A day here, an afternoon there is all that is currently available within the parameters we have set. I still have a few more places to investigate that a friend just suggested. It all takes time, and when one is in the midst of care giving, accomplishing anything is like walking through quicksand.

In the meantime, I have been communicating with a representative from the Community Ventures Corporation about a loan for The Health Club for Seniors. Banks are reluctant to loan to a start up business that wants to buy the building in which they would like to conduct business. I understand banks want to minimize risk, however, if they had all the information about our business and the location, including the building itself, they would realize their risk is minimal. If we didn’t attract the membership we anticipate, the bank would become owners of some prime real estate in an up and coming retail/light industry area, which they could sell at a profit.

We have also been working at setting up a bank account for our grandsons so that any money donated to help them can be deposited and distributed solely for their needs. Currently, my son in working at a low wage full time job and I am not bringing in an income. He has been granted child care assistance, but it is not paying me for my time. Lawrence is a teacher and works part time at Kroger. I must open The Health Club for Seniors soon or get a full time job just to maintain our modest lifestyle. The certificate of need expires soon. The time is now or never.